Friday, July 31, 2009


The Gingerbread Man:




There once was a little old man and a little old woman, who lived in a little old house on the edge of the woods.

They would have been a very happy old couple but for one thing -- they were hungry.

One day, when the little old woman was baking gingerbread, she cut a cake in the shape of a man, and put it into the oven.

Presently she went to the oven to see if it was baked. As soon as the oven door was opened, the gingerbread man jumped out, and began to run away as fast as he could go.

The little old woman called her husband, and they both ran after him. "We want to eat you!" They said. But they could not catch him. And soon the gingerbread man came to a barn full of threshers.

He called out to them as he went by, saying:

"I've run away from a little old woman, a little old man, and I can run away from you too, I can!"

"Run, run as fast as you can. You can't catch me, I'm the gingerbread man!"

Then the barn full of threshers set out to run after him. But, though they ran fast, they could not catch him.

And he ran on 'till he came to a field full of mowers. He called out to them:

I've run away from a little old woman, a little old man, a barn full of threshers, and I can run away from you too, I can!"

"Run, run as fast as you can. You can't catch me, I'm the gingerbread man!"

Then the mowers began to run after him, but they couldn't catch him. And he ran on 'till he came to a cow.

He called out to her:

"I've run away from a little old woman, a little old man, a barn full of threshers, a field full of mowers, and I can run away from you too, I can!"

"Run, run as fast as you can. You can't catch me, I'm the gingerbread man!"

But, though the cow started at once, she couldn't catch him. And soon he came to a horse. He called out to the horse:

"I've run away from a little old woman, a little old man, a barn full of threshers, a field full of mowers, a cow, and I can run away from you too, I can!"

"Run, run as fast as you can. You can't catch me, I'm the gingerbread man!"

But the horse ran, and couldn't catch him. And he ran 'till he came across a nigger, and to it he called out:

"I've run away from a little old woman, a little old man, a barn full of threshers, a field full of mowers, a cow and a horse, and I can run away from you too, I can!"

"Run, run as fast as you can. You can't catch me, I'm the gingerbread man!"

Then the nigger set out to run full-tilt.

Now niggers can run very fast, and so the nigger almost caught the gingerbread man, but the gingerbread man crossed the finish line and took the 1st place trophy.

Just then, a lion entered the finishing shoot, and was poised to pounce on the gingerbread man, but the quick-thinking gingerbread man threw his trophy at the lion's head, and scurried out of there, up a tree.

The gingerbread man tried to warn the nigger by shouting "You had better get your black ass up a tree, or that lion is going to make dinner out of you."

"Even I, the gingerbread man, cannot outrun a lion!"

The nigger replied "Why would he eat me? I'm not the one who threw a trophy at his head!"

And so after the lion came to his senses, he ate the dumb nigger.

Oscar's Commentary ( Moral Of The Story ) : It ain't bragging if you can back it up, but a good man knows his limitations.

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